I sat down to write a post about the importance of routine and instead, I feel completely convicted to get something off my chest. Sit back, relax and if I press a few buttons, please know that I am sorry and that it is only my intention to “speak my mind” through a post and maybe clear up some cloudiness that has invaded my mind.
In this new-found quest to prioritize my life and manage my time better, I have learned a few powerful lessons.First off, I have learned to stop saying…. “I can’t wait until next week”, “When ____ happens everything will be different”. By saying those things, I am missing the now. I am missing precious time with my family. The bible says to number your days(“Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom” – Psalm 90: 12) which literally makes my stomach turn and my eyes well up with tears. I don’t want to do that. But I know that when I purposely think about it, I look at my kids more, I watch what they are watching, I play with them, I get off of Facebook, I am just here. I think about the fact that there will never, ever, be this day again. They are only this age, on this day, once. No do overs. What a sobering thought. I find myself thinking about that a lot throughout the day, especially when it’s 3;30 in the afternoon, I haven’t showered, the kids are fighting, the house is a mess, the clothes in the washing machine have been in there and washed a least three times, the dogs stepped in dog poop and have drug it through the house, I haven’t even thought about dinner and Eric calls to say he’ll be late…..yes, I remind myself to stop, slow down and look at my kids. Does it always make things better? Hell no. But more often than not, I chill out a bit.
The next lesson I learned is an extension of the previous one. That;s my fancy segue of saying, because I have been thinking about this (the numbering our days thing) I have become increasingly concerned with another problem. Parents. Yep, you read that right. Parents. Not mine, mine are the bomb diggity. But other parents. Parents are what’s wrong with the kids today. I look at particular parents and just shudder in disbelief. I am sure that some of you will completely disagree with me and that’s totally fine. I, however, have been in different situations in which I have seen behaviors of parents that blow my mind. Being a teacher, I saw first hand how parents were involved or not involved with their child. I saw how other adults were treated, how they were treating other children, and how they treated me. As a result of those behaviors, I observed and noted, how their child treated other adults, other children and me. Not surprising that the behaviors were extremely similar. Now, as a mom, I see it with other parents at play dates field trips, grocery stores, school, etc. It’s amazing to me how they act. Now please understand that I am not saying in the least, that I am mom of the year. I am not. I do not have all the answers and I am not claiming to. I am making damn sure that my kids have a loving heart though.. I see these women with spiteful, evil hearts and I feel for those kids. They will know no different. I want to instill in my kids the values and morals of decent, kind human beings. I want them to be the popular kids that when they see someone who is upset or left out or have just gotten beat up for crying out loud, to be the ones to go and sit next to that person and make it better. I will never allow my children to be the bully, to leave certain kids out because I don’t like their parents or because they are not considered cool. It is a new mission of mine to raise them better than that. I didn’t really think I would learn this lesson when the kids are 5 and 3, but apparently God really wants me to listen to this and make sure that I am aware of what Eric and I are teaching them and what they are observing and hearing from us. Wow…this being a parent is heavy stuff.
So while I sit here and type in my sweats, un-showered, my kids are taking a nap, my three messy, smelly dogs are all sleeping right in front of me, the weather outside is damn near perfect, I have a fresh glass of water with frozen strawberries bobbing in it, I am completely humbled at the fact that I have learned these lessons now. It will be a challenge for a while, to maintain the mentality of ’numbering my days’ and to make sure that I am leading with a loving heart (which is way harder than I could have imagined), but I want a life of memories. I don’t want to keep saying that I am crazy busy, but can’t really explain what I am busy with. I know the word intentional is the new buzz word, but that’s okay. Living an intentional life SHOULD be what we are doing. My phrase for the year is Make it happen. I think maybe I will change it to Intentionally….make it happen.
This video is great, we watched in our class last night. It’s 11 minutes long, but I thought it was a great message. I am so excited that I found these guys on YouTube. Btw….it should be the video entitled Chisel….if not, something went wrong, lol. You can find it on You Tube very easily….
Have a wonderful, wonderful day…..